Sunday, November 14, 2010

Just Some Things I Want to Say...

First of all...

Dear Kroger, When I bought your "All Natural" Frozen Cut Okra I didn't realize that "All Natural" meant that 1/3 of the package would be the tops of the okra. Please fix that. Thank you.

On a positive cooking note, I am loving Mrs. Dash Tomato/Basil/Herb seasoning. It is simply delish.

On another positive note, I've lost 4 1/2 pounds. Hoping I have the willpower to stay the course this time. After much analysis I realized that I cannot stick with any (healthy eating) plan because I am too easily bored. For instance, Weight Watchers? Tired of counting points. Flat Belly Diet? Tired of trying to schedule eating every four hours, which never coincides with times my family is eating. South Beach? Tired of eggs and salads.

Of course here is where most people would say, "You just need to exercise more." You know what? I'm not listening to you. (fingers in ears) I know it, ok? And, I have been walking around my neighborhood for a brief walk the last couple weeks. Guess what? I'm starting to get bored with that, too. Why can't there be a Scrapbooker's Diet? Let me lay it out for you...

Meal One: Eat a delicious breakfast of big, fat buttery cinnamon rolls with a huge cup of coffee. Pour a second cup of coffee to take to your scrapbook table. Make sure both cups of coffee have plenty of cream and real sugar. Scrapbook for four hours.

Meal Two: Have delivered to your scrapbook room a delicious mushroom/swiss cheese burger with seasoned fries, lots of ketchup and a Diet Coke. (The thought here being that the Diet Coke will offset the fries.) Continue scrapbooking after washing hands. Gotta watch those greasy hands on your paper.

Snack: A delivery of a fresh Diet Coke along with a bowl of popcorn, and possibly a piece of dark chocolate and some almonds will be just the things to tide you over until your evening meal. Continue working on your albums after this small snack break.

Meal Three: Ribeye Steak, Baked Potato (loaded, but no chives please) and a Caesar salad will be your final "big" meal of the day. How about some Crystal Light to drink with that? After all, you should try to cut calories where you can. Not really ready for dessert after that steak, so will reserve it for a late evening "pick me up" snack. Wow! Getting lots of work done on my albums today.

Dessert: How about a nice cup of hot tea and some peach cobbler with Bluebell Vanilla Ice Cream? A couple more hours on the scrapbook and then time for bed...

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have another letter to write. I'll be asking NBC for a chance to star in next year's "The Biggest Loser." And it's all thanks to my Scrapbooker's Diet -- the only eating plan I managed to stick with for an entire year!


2 comments:

Barb said...

Ha! I love the scrapbooker's diet, in principle at least. Some of the meals would need to be adjusted for the "selective" eaters - for example, you did not include pickles anywhere in there, and I would trade the chocolate for twizzlers and the coffee for sweet tea. But I like the plan nonetheless :)

Genny said...

Barb, that's the beauty of the Scrapbooker's Diet. Eat what you want, when you want. I will be happy to include your foods of choice.